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Review this week's message.

Key Thought:

Re-shape your relationships by speaking God’s truth to the people in your life.

Key Quote

“There’s nothing you can’t overcome with an open ear, a humble heart, and a positive word.” Pastor Bil Cornelius

Start talking. Find a conversation starter for your group.
  • Who is your favorite movie or TV family? Why?
  • What do you love most about the holiday season?
  • When you hear the word “marriage” what comes to mind?
  • When do you typically put out your Christmas decorations?

Start thinking. Ask a thoughtful question.
  • What is the difference between fighting and conflict? How can conflict actually be used to become closer to one another?
  • Why is it important to show love & respect to each other even when we don’t “feel” it?
  • How can you show sympathy toward your spouse?
  • How do your actions towards your parents and siblings carry over into your treatment of your spouse?

Start sharing. Choose questions that create openness.

What is something from this week’s message that really stood out to you? How can you apply it to your relationship or future relationship?

77% of self-talk is negative according to recent psychological studies. How are you with self-talk? Do you find yourself more negative or positive toward yourself? How so?

What is one positive thing you can speak over yourself each day?

How are you going to pursue your spouse this week? Singles, how can you be the type of person you’re wanting to marry?

Start praying. Be bold, and pray with power.

Dear Jesus, thank you for modeling what it means to love others and speak life. We believe that our marriages, relationships and friendships can be changed by simply doing that. Help us to uplift, encourage and to speak truth in love so we can handle conflict while still glorifying you. In your name we pray, Amen.

Start doing. Commit to a step and live it out this week.
  • Studies show 77% of self-talk is found to be negative and 6 out of 7 most common emotions people feel are negative, which means that if we’re not intentional we will be negative by default. Start training yourself to be more positive! For every negative personal thought, focus on 5 positive thoughts. Make this a habit.
  • How you speak to your friends, siblings, and co-workers is how you’ll ultimately speak to your spouse. Every day find at least one thing to encourage the people in your life. Become a person people want to be by uplifting and encouraging them.
  • We often think positive, encouraging things about others, but never voice. Begin a habit today by voicing your encouraging thoughts to those around you. Start now by saying one encouraging thing you’ve thought about everyone in the group.


Help to carry one another’s burdens, and in this way you will obey the law of Christ. Galatians 6:2GN

It’s better to have a partner than go it alone. Share the work, share the wealth. And if one falls down, the other helps, But if there’s no one to help, tough! ...By yourself you’re unprotected. With a friend you can face the worst. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 MES

“Don’t be afraid of them. Remember the Lord, who is great and awesome, and fight for your families, your sons and your daughters, your wives and your homes.” Nehemiah 4:14b NIV

“If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back. But if you are unsuccessful, take one or two others with you and go back again, so that everything you say may be confirmed by two or three witnesses. If the person still refuses to listen, take your case to the church. Then if he or she won’t accept the church’s decision, treat that person as a pagan or a corrupt tax collector.” Matthew 18:15-17 NLT

“...Reliable communication permits progress…” Proverbs 13:17 TLB

Foolish people are always fighting, but avoiding quarrels will bring you honor. Proverbs 20:3 NCV

Dear brothers and sisters, be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. Your anger can never make things right in God’s sight. James 1:19 NLT

Make a clean break with all cutting, backbiting, profane talk. Be gentle with one another, sensitive. Forgive one another as quickly and thoroughly as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:31-32 MSG

So each husband should love his wife as much as he loves himself, and each wife should respect her husband. Ephesians 5:33 CEV

But encourage one another day after day, as long as it is still called “Today,” so that none of you will be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin. Hebrews 3:13 NAS

Finally, all of you should be of one mind, full of sympathy toward each other, loving one another with tender hearts and humble minds. Don’t repay evil for evil. Don’t retaliate when people say unkind things about you. Instead, pay them back with a blessing. That is what God wants you to do, and he will bless you for it. 1 Peter 3:8-9 NLT

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